A Mess

Does anyone else feel like a complete failure in the most simplest tasks? I find that the harder I try, the more I seem to fail...I keep telling myself it seems like I am failing more but I am just more conscious of the failures and somehow that is actually progress, but I am still not convinced.

These failures seem even too pathetic to bring to the Lord. It isn't like I need to pray for strength to get through some life-threatening disease, or wisdom to get my child away from drugs or patience while being laid-off. These are failures of just making my day go without quite so much chaos...of not yelling my children, or not knocking over the left-over cup of milk in or the fridge or on the counter or the table or wherever my child may choose to put it. It is not remembering something on my grocery list and having to go back; forgetting a previously scheduled event when I make a hair cut appointment....

These are no-big-deal kind of things, but in the long run they weary me because I seem to be ALWAYS doing them. Lord can I pray that I would be less of an idiot?? Can I pray for neater, better aligned brain cells that are just so scattered around up there in that cavern of a head? Is there a verse in Proverbs about using more post-it notes in order not to forget things?

I guess it all comes to learning more patience - not just me learning more patience when I screw up, but praying that others will have more patience around me and toward me. I know the Lord has made me who I am...I know that I am to be striving for more in my spiritual walk with him. But it seems that I could get a whole lot more done spiritually if I could get this earthly mess a little more cleaned up.

So Lord, I am sorry I forget, that I mess up, that I am not on the ball like I would like. BUT I am thanking you for how you made me and help me to always be humbled by my failures, but not humiliated, so that in the end I can still give you Glory.